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Thanksgiving Jokes

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Q: What kind of music did the Pilgrims like?
A: Plymouth Rock!

Q: Why don't you let a turkey get near corn?
A: Because they will gobble, gobble, gobble it.

Q: What do you call a turkey whizzing through the air past your head because the oven exploded?
A: Fast food.

Q: Why couldn't the Thanksgiving entertainment band perform?
A: Somebody had eaten the drumsticks.

Q: What do jazzy people put on their potatoes at Thanksgiving?
A: Groovy.

Q: What did the turkey say to the turkey hunter?
A: "Quack! Quack! Quack!"

Q: If you call a large turkey a gobbler what do you call a small one?
A: A goblet!

Q: What sound does a space turkey make?
A: Hubble, Hubble, Hubble!

Q: Why did they let the turkey join the band?
A: Because he had the drumsticks.

Q: Who is not hungry at Thanksgiving?
A: The turkey because he's already stuffed!

Q: Why do pilgrims pants keep falling down?
A: Because their belt buckles are on their hats!

Q: What happens when you're too harsh on the cranberries and make them sad?
A: They turn into blueberries.

Q: If pilgrims travel on the Mayflower, then what do college students travel on?
A: The Scholar Ships.

Q: Where did they take the Mayflower when it was sick?
A: The nearest doc.

Q: What key has legs and can't open doors?
A: Turkey!

Q: Why did the police arrest the turkey?
A: They suspected it of fowl play.

Q: If April showers bring May flowers what do May flowers bring?
A: Pilgrims!

Q: Why did the Indian chief wear so many feathers?
A: To keep his wig warm.

Q: Why did Johnny get such low grades after Thanksgiving?
A: Because everything is marked down after the holidays!

Q: What always comes at the end of Thanksgiving?
A: The letter G!

Q: When does Christmas come before Thanksgiving?
A: In the dictionary!

Q: Why did the turkey cross the road?
A: It was the chicken's day off!

Q: Can a turkey jump higher than the Empire State Building?
A: Yes - a building can't jump at all.

Q: What would you get if you crossed a Pilgrim with a type of cracker?
A: A Pilgraham!

Q: What did the turkey say before it was roasted?
A: Boy! I'm stuffed!

Q: What would you get if you crossed a turkey with an ghost?
A: A poultrygeist!

Q: What kind of tan did pilgrims get?
A: Puritan.

Q: What do comedians call Thanksgiving?
A: Pranks-giving.

Q: Why did the turkey eat his meal so quickly?
A: Because he was a gobbler.

Q: What's the best thing to put into a pumpkin pie?
A: Your teeth.

Q: What sound does a turkey's phone make?
A: Wing Wing!

Q: How do you keep a turkey in suspense?
A: I'll tell you at Christmas.

Q: Why should you keep your eye off the turkey dressing?
A: Because it makes him blush!

Q: Which side of the turkey has the most feathers?
A: The outside.

Q: What do you get when you cross a turkey with an octopus?
A: Enough drumsticks for Thanksgiving.

Q: If fruit comes from a fruit tree, where does turkey come from?
A: A poul-tree.

Q: How do you make a turkey float?
A: Root beer, a scoop of ice cream, and a turkey.

Q: If there were still Pilgrims alive today, what would they be famous for?
A: Their age!

Q: What did the mother turkey say to her disobedient children?
A: If your father could see you now, he'd turn over in his gravy!

Q: What does Dracula call Thanksgiving?
A: Fangs-giving!

Q: Why can't you take a turkey to church?
A: Because they use such fowl language.

Q: What did the baby corn say to mama corn?
A: Where's pop corn?

Q: What do you wear to Thanksgiving dinner?
A: A Har-VEST.

Q: What do you get when you divide the circumference of a pumpkin by its diameter?
A: Pumpkin pi!

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